When I eat out it often amazes me at how the other customers have no regard for the other diners, the staff of the restaurant or the venue itself. So I have put together a small guide of how to eat out!
Before you go out
Before you go out, consider why you are going out in the first place. If it is the local rugby teams going to celebrate their win, then decide on a restaurant that caters for that kind of noisy group. However if it is your first romantic dinner with the person of your dreams, you may want to go somewhere with candles and that "loving feeling."
Choose your restaurant carefully for not only your own needs, but also the needs of others. Can you imagine the results on the romantic couple if they get beer thrown over them by the rugby team? Not the best night possible!
Reservations
Most good restaurants get busy, so before you go, reserve your area or table well in advance. Don't expect that the restaurant will be able to accommodate 30 half drunk rugby players (by the way I have nothing against rugby players) without notice, likewise it could be good to plan you romantic night out by speaking to the staff first and explain what you would like, which table you would like and how they can handle things like billing, etc. If you want to make a good impression, pay for the meal before you go so that there are no embarrassing moments.
Dress Codes
When going to a restaurant, observe their dress codes. The restaurant owners want a certain type of clientele and they set dress codes accordingly. Not a good idea to go half naked with an adult diaper on to the 5 star restaurant even if you are going to the fancy dress party later. I know someone who actually did that and couldn't understand why they wouldn't let him in!
When you stand in front of the mirror before you go out, check that you are dressed accordingly for the venue. It will save embarrassing moments later.
Arrive on time
A few minutes early or late are acceptable, but anything more than 15 or 20 minutes is rude. If you are running late for any reason call the restaurant and let them know. Remember that restaurants are there to serve you, but also they need to make money so that they can serve you in the future.
Wait to be seated
If there is a sign that says "Please wait to be seated" then do wait. It is quite possible that they have a room layout for the night and they need to fit everyone in. If you don't get seated promptly let the staff know politely and ask to be seated without fuss.
Table ethics
Please mind your manners. Don't throw food around, don't spit on the floor, don't put your seat so far out from the table that you block the isles, don't speak to loud so that everyone in the restaurant can hear your life story, (we really don't care) don't smoke cigars unless it is allowed, (in fact more and more restaurants are no smoking now), don't bang your knife of the glass every time you want to say something, don't snap your fingers and shout "Garson!" every time you want the waiter.
Do be polite and courteous of other diners. Treat the staff nicely they want to serve you and anyway if you don't the head chef might spit in your food! At peak times in the restaurant notice that they may be more busy than normal and accept that there may be slight delays.
Ordering
Choose your food carefully and make sure the waiter repeats your order to you. Don't go to a restaurant and then sit there for two hours deciding on the food. Order promptly so that the staff can serve you well (unless you have made prior arrangements). Thank the waiter for bringing things to you. They are human beings and have feelings. They do exist and they are not your personal servant. Most of them work in this business because they love it. If something goes wrong with the order, if it is not life threatening it could be ok just to accept it as a mistake, but if you feel that something is really wrong, let the staff know discretely and politely.
Decide on eating what you want, not just eating the "special of the day" because the waiter is recommending it. Sometimes the "special" is the "special" because they want to get rid of it for some reason. Maybe they over ordered on wine and need to shift it fast. (I know this happens as I used to work in a restaurant myself).
Eating
When actually eating the food, remember that it has been lovingly prepared for you. Throwing it around the restaurant is a complete lack of respect. Again be observant of the people around you. Picking your teeth with your whole hand and sticking your fingers in your nose is not acceptable behavior in most restaurants. Don't eat too fast. Enjoy the food. Eating slowly is much better for you anyway. It aids digestion. However don't take so long that the food starts to decompose! Remember that the staff also has their homes to go to.
Desert and Coffee
After the main course, allow the food to go down a bit before taking desert or coffee. I have actually seen someone eating a main course and his desert at the same time. I wonder how beef and ice-cream tastes!
Check to see if the coffee is refill as it can get expensive after 10 fill-ups if it is not. If there is a group of you, you may even be able to get a group rate. Coffee can add a huge amount to a bill.
Paying the Bill
If you are a group, let the restaurant know if you want to pay individually before eating so that they can prepare the bills accordingly. Remember to take cash or credit cards with you as most places do not accept checks.
Pay promptly. Do check your bill. There are a few restaurants that "add-on" hoping that you won't notice, especially if you have had a few drinks. If there is a problem with the bill it probably is a mistake and if you notify the staff politely they will almost always change it for you. Do not make it out to be 3rd world war as it probably was a genuine mistake. If things can't be fixed ask to speak to the duty manager who will almost always have the authority to change it.
Tipping
The issue of tipping is one of my personal gripes in life. I believe that tipping should be at the sole discretion of the people eating and not compulsory. In fact it is not legal (in most countries) to demand a tip. My feeling is that the staff has been paid to do a job and they should do that job with all due care and excellence regardless of tip or not. If the staff should find that they are not getting many tips, maybe they should look at the quality of service as most people will willingly tip good service. If service has been exceptionally bad you are within your right to ask for it to be removed. Unfortunately, in some places they may not want you to come back if you do this, so you may want to expect some negative thoughts even if that is wrong. You may also want to tip a particular member of staff separately if they have performed really well. Don't forget to tip though if the service has been good. 10 to 15% is an acceptable amount. I actually saw a customer throw some coins at the bar as a tip once and he probably wasn't welcome again so remember to be polite and respectful when tipping.
Leaving the restaurant
Remember that the staff has probably been working most of the day, so they are tired. Try not to stay until you are the last customer and drag it out as they stack all the chairs on the table, turn out the lights and sit waiting for you to go home.
Also remember to thank the door man. I actually worked as a doorman for 6 weeks in London once and it was incredibly lonely as most people do not even see you let alone say hello. They are part of the restaurant experience and are there for your comfort, so remember to acknowledge them. It is actually really hard work standing on a door for 5 or 6 hours.
Remember also to observe the neighbors. People often live around a restaurant and having a brawling mob every night can be tiring. Even watching the romantic couple making out is not fun after the 1st or 2nd night. Screeching tires of your car, shouting good bye and other disrespectful actions will not get you any points and actually does damage to the restaurant. If enough neighbors complain about the noise the restaurant may eventually get closed down. What a shame that would be?
Finally
Going out should be a wonderful experience. The diners are as responsible as the restaurant for a good evening. It really is a two way effort. Try to remember your part of the night and that the world does not revolve around you. Observe the comments above and you should be in for a better time.
If not please let me know which restaurant you are going to so I can go somewhere else.
Tim Bennett
millionaireanonymous.com
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